Old Farts, More Farts

Life is always an adventure with my father. 

An embarrassing adventure. 

And until I started telling you about them, I never realized just how many of these adventures take place away from home. 

Anyway...

We were sitting in the waiting area of his doctor's office. One of his many doctors, I might add, and one of his many doctor's appointments. The office was packed, and we found ourselves sitting on opposite sides of the room. Wherever I go, I usually bring a book to read. Either that, or I use my phone to write stories.

Like this one.

The person in the chair next to him heard his name called and went inside to have his vitals taken. The way he slowly shuffled away from us, I think his vitals were taken from him years ago.

An elderly lady came into the office. Seeing the only chair available, she hobbled over to sit next to my father.

Just then, my father's name was called.

As the lady was sitting down, my father stood up.

Maybe a bit too fast...

BRAAAP!

...and he let out a huge fart.

The office was as quiet as a library. 

Everybody turned to look at him.

Without missing a beat my father turned to the old lady, who had a horrified look on her wrinkly old face, and with a tone of disgust he said loud enough for everyone in the office to hear, "You should be ashamed of yourself!"