"You're a man of Faith, aren't you, Governor Perry?" "Yes, I am. I've read the Bible 14 times, and when I get to the part where Jesus builds the ark and saves all the animals, I find that incredibly inspiring." "Uh, it was Noah who built the ark." "What?" "It was Noah who built the ark." "Are you saying I'm wrong? I'm not wrong, I'm the man! And you'll notice that Jesus didn't save the unicorns. That's because unicorns have horns... the devil has horns... I don't think I need to spell it out for you." "Do you feel, then, that your political career has been more of a calling than a choice?" "Let me put it this way: I've never lost an election. Never. I give all credit to my Lord and God, Yahtzee." "Uh...
I got home from work the other night, and saw my little girl was watching the holiday classic Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer . I grimaced. I'm not saying that holiday special is bad (which it is), I'm just saying the only thing worse would be listening to Miley Cyrus sing Nirvana's Smells Like Teen Spirit . (And the only thing worse than that is watching her dance to it.) I sat down anyway, and watched it with her. Once again, I was reminded of that time, not so long ago, when I met a brave little pig. I drove down to a farm in the lower valley of El Paso, because I had heard farmers tended to have attractive daughters with liberal ideas about hospitality, but, instead of a daughter, this farmer had a pig. The pig was missing three of it slegs, one of its two eyes, both ears, its tail, and part of its snout. ...
as featured in Desert Exposure Magazine desertexposure.com I don’t know what it is about newspapers, but they must think their readers have unlimited time and money to cook the recipes they feature in their pages. Most of us, we have jobs. We don’t want to come home and spend hours fixing something that can easily be bought at Sam’s or Costco or the corner gas station. Not to mention the cleanup afterward. Also, if I fill my refrigerator with food, where am I going to keep my beer? The recipes always seem to require a cornucopia of ingredients that you probably don’t have and will never use again. I don’t think Jesus multiplied the fishes into a number that high. It just seems to me that newspapers should acknowledge that we live in a different world now, and there’s no longer enough hours in the day for us to prepare these extravagant meals. Recently, my local newspaper printed something by T...
Comments
Post a Comment