STDs

The question even caught ME by surprise.

     When you get back from vacation life goes back to normal no matter how long you've been away. There are groceries to buy, floors to mop, naps to take... and doctors to see. My granddaughter had to go to the eye doctor. My son had an appointment to see the foot doctor. I used to listen to Dr. Dean Edell on the radio and he once said that you don't want to have a woman's reproductive system before the age of fifty and you don't want to have a man's reproductive system after the age of fifty. That was the kind of doctor my father had to see.

     When my father and I were signing in at the front desk, the girl who was checking us in was asking him questions that he would also have to answer on the paperwork she was giving us to fill out. These days you have to answer the same questions four times: to the receptionist, in the paperwork, the doctor’s assistant, and finally to the doctor him- or herself when they finally grace you with their presence. Like in an episode of The Twilight Zone where you relive the same day over and over again, these are questions you’ve answered before. The last time you visited and the dozen times before that.

     But THIS one was different.

     “Do you have an STD?” the receptionist asked.

     I thought that was rather personal to be asked outside of an examining room. She must have been new. Or thought my father was cute.

     My father grumbled a no.

     When we were back in our seats waiting to be called so he could have his vitals taken, my father complained, “An STD? Why do they need to know what kind of car I drive?”