No Cents Of Human Decency
Ever since President Trump discontinued the penny, businesses have colluded into cheating us out of our hard-earned cash. It used to be a penny saved was a penny earned, but these days a penny saved is just laughed at by the other change in your pocket. The presidential bullies all face left, leaving poor Abraham Lincoln nervously checking over his shoulder for John Wilkes Booth. While these coins may seem annoying when they're jangling heavily in your pocket like a copper clot, you should consider a penny as the first brick you use in building your fortune, and on my last trip to McDonald's that creepy clown tried to cheat me out of TWO bricks. My order was simple, and the amount came out to $16.53. I handed the cashier a twenty, did the math in my head, and expected back $3.47. "Here's your change, sir," the cashier politely said, handing me back three dollar bills, a...