At MY advanced age, I can’t help but notice everything on my body is heavier, hairier, and closer to the ground.
Why, just the other day Christian had a close call, and, if it weren’t for his superior driving abilities, he might not be here to nibble my muffin.
Blueberry.
I was watching TV when the Fox news anchor--the one with the big tits--interrupted with Breaking News. Someone was driving down the freeway...
IN THE WRONG DIRECTION!
Well, my heart just about FROZE.
CHRISTIAN should be on his way home!
And he ALWAYS takes the freeway!
Holy crap, I was SO worried.
What if that idiot driving the wrong way was in a head-on collision with my beloved husband? How could I live without him? How could my life go on? How does that news anchor keep her teeth so white?
I immediately got on the phone.
“Christian!” I cried out when he answered. “Where are you?”
“I’m on the freeway,” he said, calmly, “driving home.”
“Well, be careful,” I warned. “That blonde news anchor...”
“The one with the big tits?”
“Yes, That one. She’s reporting that there’s one driver on the freeway who’s driving the wrong way!”
“Not just one, Ana,” Christian informed me. “There’s hundreds. And they’re ALL driving the wrong way.”
American Chimpanzee
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