Thursday, May 30, 2019

The Week In Tweets: Special Jailed-In-El Paso Edition!

Fake News Reports!
  
Why did the chicken cross the road?
That depends...
Was the chicken crispy or original recipe?
  
Sully, President George H.W. Bush's Service Dog, Paid Tribute To Her Former Master On Memorial Day!
Now, did she really pay tribute, or did someone drag her to his grave for a picture?
  
You should eat healthy foods and avoid snacks.
Because those snacks are mine.
  
Beto O'Rourke Is Giving Unprecedented Access Into The Personal And Political Toll Running For Office Has Taken On Him And His Family!
Beto's presidential campaign has barely started and already he's complaining?
  
The Border Patrol Captured Over 2,200 Foreign Nationals Crossing Into The United States Illegally In The El Paso/New Mexico Area On Memorial Day!
"It was very memorable," the migrant caravaners all agreed.
  
Has-Been "Who's The Boss" Child Actress Alyssa Milano On Day 87 Of Sex Strike!
Wow, Alyssa, you must have some very strong feelings about a woman's right to infanticide.
"Not really. I just needed an excuse not to have sex with my husband."
  
Mexican Drug Lord "El Jaguar" Of Gente Nuevo, A Branch Of The Sinaloa Cartel, Jailed In El Paso!
"Can you help me, officer?" he said upon entering the United States. "I am seeking asylum and I was separated from my parents at the border."
  
The Restocking Of Fish At Young Park Pond In Las Cruces Will Be Delayed Due To Vandalism!
Nothing worse than fish vandals.
  
Why Was The Evidence Thrown Out In The Santa Fe Snowplow Driver's Case?
It melted.
  
Las Cruces Student Kristina Martian, 14, Survives Third Round Of Scripps National Spelling Bee!
What's more amazing than a talking dog?
A spelling bee.
  
  
American Chimpanzee
JimDuchene.BlogSpot.com
RaisingMyFather.BlogSpot.com
@JimDuchene
  

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