Fake News Reports!
They say opposites attract, but in MY experience, it's been more of a collision.
Due To The Coronavirus Closure, The Shedd Aquarium In Chicago, Illinois Let Its Penguins Roam Free!
"Great," the aquarium janitor groused. "Now guess who's gotta clean up all that penguin poop."
Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau Calls Innocent Migrants Trying To Enter His Country "IRREGULAR"!
In a continuing effort to be the most woke human on this planet EVER, he continues to be the most insulting.
It was the least I could do, and I always do the least I can do.
China Reports:
NO NEW CORONAVIRUS CASES!
"It's amazing how quickly the numbers improve," bragged Chinese President Xi Jinping, "when you quit testing people."
Harvey Weinstein Tests POSITIVE For The Coronavirus While In Prison!
"Get in line," says syphilis and gonorrhea.
A pickup line in the age of Coronavirus:
"I have toilet paper."
How are the former royals Harry & Meghan Markle doing in they age of Coronavirus after renouncing his Prince-hood?
"What do you MEAN we lost our health insurance?!!!"
Businesses closing. People losing their jobs. Non-violent criminals no longer being arrested. But the cops are STILL out in force...
...handing out speeding tickets.
Comedian Kathy Griffin, Despite Having The Symptoms, Was REFUSED A Test For The Coronavirus!
"I'd like a second opinion," she told her physician.
"Okay," the doctor said, "you're also ugly."
Jim Duchene
Fake News Chief Correspondent
Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau Calls Innocent Migrants Trying To Enter His Country "IRREGULAR"!
In a continuing effort to be the most woke human on this planet EVER, he continues to be the most insulting.
It was the least I could do, and I always do the least I can do.
China Reports:
NO NEW CORONAVIRUS CASES!
"It's amazing how quickly the numbers improve," bragged Chinese President Xi Jinping, "when you quit testing people."
Harvey Weinstein Tests POSITIVE For The Coronavirus While In Prison!
"Get in line," says syphilis and gonorrhea.
A pickup line in the age of Coronavirus:
"I have toilet paper."
How are the former royals Harry & Meghan Markle doing in they age of Coronavirus after renouncing his Prince-hood?
"What do you MEAN we lost our health insurance?!!!"
Businesses closing. People losing their jobs. Non-violent criminals no longer being arrested. But the cops are STILL out in force...
...handing out speeding tickets.
Comedian Kathy Griffin, Despite Having The Symptoms, Was REFUSED A Test For The Coronavirus!
"I'd like a second opinion," she told her physician.
"Okay," the doctor said, "you're also ugly."
Jim Duchene
Fake News Chief Correspondent
American Chimpanzee
JimDuchene.BlogSpot.com
RaisingMyFather.BlogSpot.com
@JimDuchene
No comments:
Post a Comment