Fake News Reports!
A POEM:
If there’s nothing
I wouldn’t do for you,
and
there’s nothing
you wouldn’t do for me,
is that how we’ll spend our lives?
Doing nothing for each other?
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CEO Mark Zoidberg And Vice President Of Artificial Intelligence Jerome Pesenti Say They Are Shutting Down Facebook’s HAL 9000 Facial Recognition Program!
Or ARE they?
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Overheard At The COP26:
“But enough about Satchel Paige, let me tell you about Satchel Paige.”
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The Financial Times Reports That, Because Of Climate Change, By 2070 The Earth Will Be Practically Unlivable For 3 Billion Of Its Inhabitants!
Well, I guess that solves the world’s overpopulation problem.
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Emergency Mail-In Ballots From China Delayed By Sec. of Trans. Pete Buttigieg’s Supply Chain Collapse Cause Democrats To Lose Tuesday’s 2021 Election!
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Elon Musk Says He’s Ready To End World Hunger By Giving The United Nations Six Billion Dollars Providing They Come Up With A Workable Plan!
“You mean you’re expecting us to WORK?” the U.N. gasps in disbelief.
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Attempting To Defend Sec. Of Trans. Buttigieg For Taking Over Two Months Of Paternity Leave While The U.S. Supply Chain He Was In Charge Of Collapsed, The Bloomberg QuickTake Reports That The Economy Benefits When Men Do That!
Can you give us an example?
“No.”
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Fact-Checkers Confirm That The Statement By President Trump Concerning Alec Baldwin Was FABRICATED!
The fake news media?
Lying?
I don’t believe it.
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Thousands Of Visitors To Shanghai Disneyland Have Been Locked Inside, Forbidden To Leave!
The excuse?
COVID-19.
The real reason?
Squeak Games Part Two.
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Like my dear ol’ pappy used to say: “You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time… and that’s just enough to get a crooked politician elected.”
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Jim Duchene
Fake News Chief Correspondent
read my RaisingDad humor column for caregivers at Desert Exposure Magazine
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