Fake News Reports!
I used to have a mustache, but my ex got it in the divorce.
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In An Address To The United Nations, The Royal Formerly Known As Prince Harry Admitted How Climate Change Has Left Him Feeling “Battered And Helpless”!
“Climate change,” of course, being code for “marriage to Meghan Markle.”
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On NBC’s “Meet The Press,” Biden’s Climate Czar John Kerry Warns, “We Are Way Behind” And Need To “Accelerate The Transition” To Green Energy!
“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to get on my private jet and take a joyride to one of my many mansions.”
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In His Campaign For Governor, Green Energy Candidate Beto O’Rourke Begins His 5,600+-Mile, 49-Day “Drive For Texas” Today!
And what would you like to accomplish by doing all that driving, B.O.?
“I’d like to get all those selfish Americans to stop using fossil fuels.”
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While Speaking Before The United Nations, The Royal Formerly Known As Prince Harry Took The Strongest Stance He’s Ever Taken On Abortion!
“Whatever my wife says,” he said.
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In His Address To The U.N., The Royal Formerly Known As Prince Harry Accused The U.S. Of “Rolling Back… Constitutional Rights” In A “Global Assault On Democracy”!
“And if any of you understand what I just said, I’d appreciate your explaining it to me.”
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Franziska Trautmann & Max Steitz, Cofounders Of Glass Half Full, Is Using Sand Made From Glass To Help Rebuild The New Orleans Coastline!
“And we don’t want to hear you complain about your bleeding feet.”
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Far be it from me to say Miley Cyrus has a relaxed grooming regimen. After all, she does have TWO hairdressers.
One for each armpit.
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Jim Duchene
Fake News Chief Correspondent
read my RaisingDad humor column for caregivers at
Desert Exposure Magazine
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