This Just In!
A Tattoo Will Get OLD...
...just like YOU!
Apple Fanatic Can't Wait To Get His Hands On An iPhone X!
"I hear it's already obsolete!" he gushes.
Astronomers Discover A Pitch Black Planet!
How did they see it?
"We didn't. It's pitch black."
Florida Sheriff Warned Public To NOT Shoot At Hurricane Irma!
"I don't CARE if you saw it on 'Sharknado!'"
World Will End... TOMORROW!
"Nibiru, aka Planet X, will CRASH into Earth September 23," he predicts. "Send $."
Woman Screens Potential Boyfriends With VERY Personal Application Form!
"I haven't had a date since 1983," she admits.
Playboy Playmate Katie Price Reveals The Single Most Disgusting Thing She Did At The Playboy Mansion!
Outraged Chocoholics Protest The Rising Cost Of Freddos!
What are Freddos?
I'm guessing some kind of chocolate.
Chinese Man Cleans People's Eyeballs With A Straight Razor!
My question is this:
Just how dirty are people's eyes in China?
Location Scout For TV Show "Narcos" MURDERED In Mexico!
What does the Mexican government say?
They're not the ones in charge.
Man Robs Bank, Then Waits To Be Arrested, All To Get Away From His Wife!
"Well," his wife reveals, "he always wanted to try anal sex."
David Meade Predicts End Of The World...TOMORROW!
"Even I don't believe that nonsense," declares the very dead L Ron Hubbard."