The Week In Tweets: Special Democratic National Convention Edition!

 Fake News Reports!

 
The Democratic National Convention Formally Selects Joe Biden As Their Presidential Nominee!
"I'll have the blue Jello," the former Vice-President accepts, humbly.

Holding Their Convention Virtually This Year Due To Coronavirus Concerns, Democrats Select Joe Biden As Their Presidential Nominee!
"I'm not wearing any pants," a robust Joe Biden Solemnly promises the American people over a live video stream.

After Almost Four Years, The Bipartisan Senate Intelligence Committee Finally Releases Its Final Report In Its Trump/Russia Investigation Of The 2016 Presidential Campaign.
"We ain't got shit," they conclude.

Fake News Presents This Important Guide To Mail-In Voting:
1) Check box marked "Democrat" and mail it in.
2) If you are unable to complete Step 1, drop your ballot off at the nearest Democratic office where one of our helpful staffers will gladly do it for you.

At yesterday's Democratic Convention, Joe Biden Officially Accepted His Party's Nomination!
"I haven't been this happy since they asked me to repeat the 3rd Grade," he gushes.

"This is a shitty country and you are a shitty people," DNC speakers all concurred. "Shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, shitty, SHITTY!"
  
BREAKING: According To An Unnamed Source, A Desperate To Stay In Office President Trump Allegedly Starts Massive California Wildfires In A Pathetic Attempt To Disenfranchise Voters Of Color!

In A Recent Article, The Los Angeles Times Says There Are Things You Should Know About Kamal Harris' Husband Doug Emhoff:
1) He's not worth taking his last name in marriage, and
2) He's no Willie Brown.

  

Jim Duchene
Fake News Chief Correspondent

American Chimpanzee
JimDuchene.BlogSpot.com
RaisingMyFather.BlogSpot.com
@JimDuchene