Fake News Reports!
Today Is The 21st Day Of The 21st Year In The 21st Century!
It's one of those things that sounds good
but means nothing.
My ex always wanted a fancy carving set, but the way she cooked,
I bought her a hammer and chisel instead.
U.S. Secretary of State Mike Pompeo Accuses China Of Committing Genocide & Other Crimes Against Humanity Targeting Uyghur Muslims & Other Ethnic & Religious Minority Groups!
"Biden's president now," Chinese leader Xi Jinping gloats.
"We can do what we want."
Ecstatic Oil Companies Celebrate The Inauguration Of Joe Biden By Raising The Price Of Gasoline At The Pumps!
"And we'll continue to honor our new president this way for the next four years,"
an oil company spokesman promised.
Dr. Fauci Is Proud To Announce That The United States Will Rejoin The World Health Organization!
"And our first order of business will be to learn Chinese,"
the diminutive doctor declares.
OF COURSE the French aren't cowards.
They were the first ones to eat snails.
"I can confirm for you here the president has not spent a moment thinking about the color scheme on Air Force One," Press Secretary Jen Psaki assured the American people at a White House Briefing,"or thinking, for that matter."
Justin Trudeau spoke with Joe Biden for 30 minutes on Friday, where the Canadian Prime Minister expressed disappointment over the new president's Keystone pipeline decision,to which Biden replied: "Zzzzzzzzzzzz..."
Bloomberg QuickTake Wonders: What's Next For Small Oil Towns Now That Joe Biden Has Cancelled The Keystone XL Pipeline?
"We're screwed," was the general consensus.
I had no problems getting my elderly, President-Alzheimer's father to wear a mask.
His pants?
That's another matter.
Jim Duchene
Fake News Chief Correspondent
American Chimpanzee
JimDuchene.BlogSpot.com
RaisingMyFather.BlogSpot.com
@JimDuchene
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