"It stinks," is one.
"It sucks," is another.
"Where's my free cheese?" made its way in there somehow.
But it's heartening that all sides--Democrats and Republicans, liberals and conservatives, Abercrombie and Fitch-- agree on one thing: It sure makes those Tea Party guys MAD!
But, trust me, they won't be so mad once they read this Q&A, where I've hunted down the answers to your stupidest questions. I know, I know, your mama always told you that there is no such thing as a stupid question...
Well, your mama was wrong.
Q: I'm on Medicare. Do I have to buy something?
A: No. The way ObamaCare works is simple, just ask the Head Hookah of the Supreme Court, John Roberts. If you don't want to buy health insurance, you don't have to. The government will just penalize you and the horse you rode in on.
Q: So, if I already have insurance, will my coverage change?
A: Only if you consider paying more and getting less changes.
Q: Are there going to be enough doctors with all these new people getting insurance?
A: There aren't enough doctors out there now. You do the math.
Q: I have insurance through a large employer. Why should I care about this law?
A: Because no matter how much the government tells you that it's not going to, it's STILL going to come out of YOUR paycheck.
Q: My employer offers a plan, but I don't like it. Can I buy an individual plan on the exchange and perhaps qualify for a subsidy?
A: This is America, you can buy anything you can afford to buy, INCLUDING a subsidy. Just ask GE.
Q: I heard that the Affordable Care Act put in place all sorts of requirements for health insurance plans, including group plans by big companies. My company is self-insured. Do they have to comply with the new regulations?
A: Companies that self-insure must sure have a lot of extra money hanging around. Excuse me while I call the IRS.
Q: I work for a company that has about 75 workers. We don't get insurance now. Is anything going to change in 2014?
A: Yes, in 2014, not only will you not have insurance, but you'll also be out of a job.
Q: I'm the manager of a small company with six full-time employees and five part-timers. What is our company required to do for our employees under the federal law in the way of health care insurance?
A: They'll only be required to do what the average American has always been required to do: Shut up and take it!
to be continued
The Aw, Nuts! Humor Blog